Beautiful Goodbyes by N.J. Nielsen

Author:N.J. Nielsen [Nielsen, N.J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Erotic Romance Fiction
Publisher: Totally Entwined Group Ltd
Published: 2016-01-15T00:00:00+00:00

* * * *

Having one’s arm in a cast sucked. Ray was tired of the restrictions he had with the bloody plaster. He couldn’t even nurse and feed the babies with the damn thing on. And he still had another eight weeks with his arm encased as it was. It was making him very irritable, and everyone was picking up on his irritation and bearing the brunt of it.

At the moment, he was in a self-imposed time-out. He had woken up in a foul mood and he didn’t want to subject his family to it. Deep down, he knew he was suffering, perhaps belatedly, from the fact that he had realized everything his dumbass actions could have taken away from him. If the worst had happened, he would never have gotten to see their children grow up. Never have gotten to see his sons become men. Never have gotten to walk his daughters down the aisle. Never have gotten to sit, old and gray, on the porch with Viv at his side as they watched their grandchildren and great-grandchildren play.

Even though he tried not to outwardly show it, nightmares were plaguing his sleep. Quite often he found himself up prowling the halls in the middle of the night, checking to make sure everything was all right within the house, always making sure he was back in bed before Viv woke of a morning. He really didn’t want to worry his husband, because he was doing enough for the both of them, and he hated feeling this way.

“I knew I would find you out here, Pa.” Jamie crossed the garden and sat on the bench beside him.

“I’m just taking in the sunshine.” Ray pasted on a smile he wasn’t at all feeling.

Jamie frowned at him. “So you aren’t worrying about what happened?”

For some reason, Jamie always seemed to hit the nail on the head. For someone so young, he was wise beyond his years.

“I’m not worrying.” He tried to sound happy and positive.

“Pa, you’ve come to your thinking spot more and more since coming home. I know because I see you from mine.” Jamie pointed up to the attic windows overlooking the garden where they were currently sitting.

Trying to change the subject away from his own morbid thoughts, Ray asked, “So what’s weighing heavily on your mind?”

“I don’t think Bear loves me anymore. Clara says he hardly mentions me at all, and that they have been going to the movies together a lot.” Sadness settled over Jamie’s face. “I have to let him go, don’t I?”

Ray blinked the tears from his eyes. His heart was being torn in two over what his son was going through. “Yeah, maybe you will. I know if he can, he will come back to you. He’s probably just trying to make his dad happy right now.”

“I figured that was the case. Being so far away from each other is hard. Is it okay if I still love him, even though he doesn’t seem to love me?”

“Definitely.

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